sausage is hilarious


At lunch today, word around the teacher’s lounge was about the sausage song that’s been virally rounding social media. I’d provide a link but I’m not sure if I want to have the inappropriateness linked to my page and not sure I want to contribute to giving it more hits. It’s super NSFW. Basically, it’s teens in a circle rapping about eggs, bacon, grits, and sausage (just search “eggs” on YouTube and it’ll pop up), except the freestyle part is throwing in a line about liking, wanting, or needing “SAUSAGE!” (it’s a penis euphemism, get it?!) It has a super catchy beat, and the kids have a lot of rhythm! To be fair to everyone, I’m currently still deciding whether this blog title is supposed to be sarcastic or not. On one hand, yes, the videos are highly inappropriate and idiotic considering the students’ faces are all over it and some of them are even filmed in classrooms. How stupid can you be? If you’re in high school, it’s extremely stupid. If you’re in college, no one can really stop you, but how about the fact that nothing EVAR gets deleted from the internet. That video will represent you for decades to come. It’s extremely childish over all, but is it so wrong of me to think it was even a tiny bit funny (of course, barring lines that are never funny like use of the N word, etc.)?

I work with a range of younger and older teachers and they all seemed completely appalled and in utter disbelief that the 6th graders would find it funny. Yes, it’s really sad that the internet is used to spread this depraved humor to 12 year old’s so quickly and easily. This is where some good parenting comes in. Set some controls, know what your kid is learning and where they’re learning it from. Teach them to be smart about internet use and safety. However, even if your child has not been allowed a phone or any internet privileges, you probably can’t stop them from being shown the video by a friend, even one you trust. Now, try to remember what it was like to be 12-16. Imagine watching this video for the first time. Imagine everyone at school talking about it. I think the average 12-16 year old would find it giggle-worthy or at least entertaining! All I’m saying is, is it really that hard to believe that the 6th graders think it’s funny? They also think they’re smart as hell and can go around the hallways or even the classrooms talking about sausage, believing they won’t get caught because they think we dumbass teachers are old as dirt and don’t know anything. One clever student asked a teacher, in front of the rest of the teachers and just a few hours after our lunch conversation, if she liked sausage. The little turd got busted! We discussed giving him an office referral because he knew it was sexual innuendo. I’d love to see the note go home for that one. “Your sweet little Johnny asked Mrs. Smith if she liked big fat sausages! She said, ‘only with something sweet to dip it in.'”


So now you’re all on my maturity level. You’re welcome.


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