real talk 

I’m an awful procrastinator and a fantastic fabricator of justification and both are chipping away at my career goals. 

I looked at my certificate for the first time in months and just realized that it expires in 15 days. It was a temporary certificate, only good for 1 year and that year is up. I remembered (and I don’t have the best memory) applying for it in the winter, so I thought that’s when it would expire. Turns out I applied in September and received it in October but it is still only good until June 30 of this year, not an actual 365 days from when I received it! So much sadness and disappointment in myself for sucking. And I’ve been on such a kick about how well I’ve been doing. Worst of all, three great jobs have opened up in art and English right in town and I will just watch them get filled by someone who is not me. And they deserve it because I’m a dummy. Jobs come and go, I just never, ever know when and where they will become available. Three openings is a lot in this area. And because those jobs are in town, it’s possible that only ones with 45 minute or more commutes will be available for who knows how long. I don’t know, I can’t see the future, but I sure can whine about the present :/ 

Thank God I can sub and I have other skills and options, I am just very upset with myself at missing these perfectly good opportunities for purely stupid reasons. It’s only my fault I haven’t already gotten a good job. I feel like God knows what’s in my future but He wants me to figure out responsibility before I can get there ***frustration***


One thought on “real talk 

  1. You should apply for the job openings anyway. Many will hire on the condition that you complete the renewal requirements within a certain time.


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